Been a while since I've done anything like this, anxiety has prohibited me from going to a lot of meetings with people I know well, never mind hardly even met, so this is a big thing.
It was on the bus ride there it set it.
Goddamn anxiety, eyes straining, hot sweats, nausea, impending doom, gotta love the panic, thank fuck for Alkaline Trio, "From Here to Infirmary" relaxes the soul and I'm feeling pretty good, quite sure music and travel are about all that keeps me going, just sucks so much that this panic stops me from enjoying both a lot of the time.
I have to wonder, do I relate to Henry Rollins or am I just a fraud copying another guys groove? I know I've felt like this for a long time but I still wonder, I think I just got inspired and it escalated what was already there. Still, I feel like a real fucking fake sometimes. Meet the girl. Still pretty. Taller than I remember. Taller than me. JE SUIS NAPOLEON! Girls taller than me is always a little weird, but I'm not here to get laid, it's just good to get out and hang with someone cool, usually alone is better for this shit, but hell, must have been something I ate.
Talk about exposure! I've heard the best way to beat anxiety is exposure and the next thing I know we're in her flat, shooting the shit, this is not me. "I need to get some milk" she says, I didn't realise she meant have a brew at her flat! My head is in pieces. But I'm doing okay.
Spent the day looking for a clown costume, she does some photography deal, this is not me. Chilling in peoples abodes, shopping, being normal. She's a cool girl though, taller than me, weird.
